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00:00
02:58
Annie Hall
Opening Monologue
00:00 - 02:27
New York comedian Alvy Singer gives an honest monologue about himself, his life, and his sentiments toward his break-up with his ex-girlfriend, Annie Hall.
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Video Transcript
0:00
this is no joke
0:01
arm
0:02
two elderly women are at a Catskills mountain resort
0:05
and one of them says
0:06
boy the food at this place is really terrible
0:08
if one says he I know
0:09
and such small portions
0:11
well
0:12
that's
0:12
essentially how I feel about life
0:14
full of
0:15
loneliness and misery and suffering and unhappiness
0:18
and
0:18
it's all over
0:19
much too quickly
0:21
the
0:22
the other important joke for me
0:23
is one that set usually
0:25
attributed to Groucho Marx but
0:27
I think it appears originally in Freud's
0:29
wit
0:29
and its relation to the unconscious
0:31
and it goes like this I'm paraphrasing
0:32
arm
0:33
I would never wanna belong to any club that would have someone like me for a member
0:38
key joke
0:39
of my adult life in terms of my relationships
0:41
with women
0:42
you know
0:43
lately that
0:44
strange things are going through my mind cause
0:46
I turned forty
0:47
I guess I'm going through a life crisis or something I don't know I am
0:50
and I'm not worried about aging that one of those characters you know I although
0:52
I'm balding slightly on
0:54
but the worst you can say about me
0:56
I yeah
0:56
I think I'm gonna get better
0:57
as I get
0:58
older
0:59
and I think I'm gonna be the
1:00
the
1:00
balding virile type
1:02
you know as opposed to say the
1:04
sting was great
1:06
but neither of those two
1:08
some of those guys with
1:09
saliva dribbling out of his mouth who
1:11
wanders into a cafeteria with a shopping bag screaming about socialism
1:16
Annie and I broke up
1:18
and I I still can't get my mind around that you know I
1:20
I keep sifting the pieces of the relationship through my mind and
1:23
and examining my life in trying to
1:25
figure out
1:26
where did the screw up come you know and
1:29
a year ago we were
1:31
in love
1:31
you know and and
1:32
and
1:33
I just and that's what I'm not I'm not a morose type I'm not a depressive character I I
1:38
you know I was a
1:39
reasonably happy kid I guess I was
1:41
brought up in
1:42
Brooklyn
1:42
during World War two
1:45
he's been depressed
1:46
all of a sudden he can't do anything
1:49
way depressed over
1:51
tell doctor flicker
1:53
it's something he read
1:55
you read on
1:56
universe is expanding
1:59
the universe is expanding
2:00
well the universe is everything
2:02
and if it's expanding someday it will break apart
2:05
out will be the end of everything
2:07
what is that your business
2:10
he stopped doing his homework
2:12
point
2:13
what would be your first got to do with it
2:15
you're here in Brooklyn
2:17
Brooklyn is not expanding
2:19
you won't be expanding for billions of years
2:23
gotta try
2:24
joy ourselves
2:25
while we're here I
